Coming to the realization that you’re creating a new life, that you’re bringing a person into this world that could possibly make astounding accomplishments, is quite humbling. After seeing this sticker on a local donation bin it made me realize not everyone feels this way. And that’s ok. But it also got me thinking about the type of world I would be bringing my daughter into.
When we first found out we would be having a baby we were both hoping for a boy. I’ve always liked the idea of my younger children having an older brother to look up to and my husband, well, he just wanted a mini version of himself really. But admittedly, I started having thoughts and hopes of having a little girl. There is a much different connection, I think, in a woman having a daughter.
But when we found out we were having a daughter everything seemed to shift. We were shocked, excited, and nervous. My mom used to always tell me that my dad was scared to have a daughter because too many bad things can happen and I think that still, sadly, rings true.
I soon started to realize all of the incidents and scenarios I would have to teach her about. What to do if someone suspiciously approached her, how to be mindful when going out for a night with her friends, what to do if someone tried to push her to do things she wasn’t comfortable with. And while it’s true that these are lessons I would want to approach with my son as well there is still a special emphasis on these types of dangers that women have to look out for.
So rather than dwell on the negative possibilities that life could throw at her I am choosing to set those aside, at least for now, and focus on the type of person I hope I can help her become. Someone that is kind, helpful to others, respectful of their opinions, and generous in her approach. Someone that gives more than she takes and that shares a respect for nature and the environment that is slowly losing emphasis in this world of convenience. I want to teach her about religion but also give her the opportunities to approach it in her own way. I want to help her see how her actions, good or bad, affect others, often in ways we don’t see. I’m excited to teach her about the rights she has as a women, even if people tend to disregard them, and how to put them into action.
Most importantly, I want to teach her by example. We can’t expect our children to become good people just because we want them to or we may tell them too. Our actions, our choices, and our reactions to situations shape those around us and can become huge impacts on our children’s lives. That doesn't mean I plan on masking every negative situation that could potentially hurt her but it means to acknowledge the bad while emphasizing the good.
Thoughts on this? I’m curious, what were some of your first thoughts when you found out you would be growing your family?